I will admit that I felt this story was funnier when I just got of the train. But now looking back, it is kind of boring. Since at least 3 people requested the write-up, I will finish writing it.

I was on the train travelling home – from York to Norwich. I had to get on another train between Peterborough and Ely. A black male sitting in front of me asked me if I am going to Cambridge. I told him that I am getting off at Ely, but the train is going to Cambridge.

Anyways, the following conversation ensued:

After further probing, he claimed that he was doing first year initial training after graduating from medical school. I naturally assumed that he is a F1 or F2 being patronising. Naturally I asked him which college he was from - he refused to answer. Due to the fact that I had previously studied in Cambridge, and the fact that I have stupid amount of friends who are studying medicine. I wanted to probe this person further.

This person did not pass the following Cambridgeness tests.

I told him to that I am doing a PhD in computer science. He proceeded to tell me that he likes technology, and he has friends who study engineering. He said they always bring home interesting stuff. I asked him if he has ever been “engineering pennied”. He did not understand what “engineering pennying” is. This was the first warning sign.

The engineering students in Cambridge have accessed to vices, they occasionally bend pennies so they would fit through the neck of a red wine bottle. This significantly increases difficulty of the pennying game. If one claims to hang around Cambridge engineers, and does not know the concept of “engineering pennying”, then one has most likely never hang around with Cambridge engineers.

Since this person refused to say which college he came from, I decided to insult him by saying that he came from St John's College.

There is an infamous saying in Cambridge - “I would rather be in Oxford than St John's”. There is apparently even a song about that, Cambridge freshers apparently occasionally sing that song outside St John's College. I know a girl who's doing / has done a PhD in Oxford, who used to go to St John's, and she was apparently quite upset by that. Therefore anyone who went to Cambridge for their undergraduate degree, who did not go to St John's, would not normally accept the claim that they are from St John's.

This person did not get the references at all. Therefore he most likely had not been in Cambridge for his undergraduate degree.

However It should be noted that this test does not apply to the Fellows who joined Cambridge later in their life. As they did not hang around with the Cambridge undergrads when they were young, they might not know. A good case is the Pembroke College Geography Director of Studies, Professor Mike Hulme.

This person claims to be CamFM, and he showed me the link to his radio show. The archived snapshot of the web page with links to has shows are here:

• Afrobeat on Cam FM With James Langford - http://archive.is/x30X6
• Slow Jam on Cam FM with James Langford - http://archive.is/w1lXp

I had never been a student radio person - I never listen to student radio. I saw that Cam FM reported on the bumps (boat races on river Cam), I made the wrong assumption that Cam FM is a Cambridge-only thing. It turns out